Breaking the Mould: Women Thriving in Technical Roles

How many of you have been the only one in the room who looks like you? And about 1982, growing up in Christ Church, New Zealand, my dad brought home one of the very first personal computers in our neighborhood. Long before it was cool, and that single decision sealed my fate for life, geek. Fast forward and my career has been anything but straight. I began in IT and I became a systems architect leading major system implementation and migrations projects across both Australia and New Zealand. These were high stakes, deeply technical and where failure wasn't an option. And they taught me the value of persistence sorry precision resilience, and leading highly complex teams under pressure. But while I was designing and

implementing systems, I was also navigating assumptions in every room. People expected less of me before I even opened my mouth or even worse, they assumed that I was not technically competent. Today, I'm the security operations manager at cyber audit team and I got my bachelor information and communications technology in 2005. I hold the Asaka certified information security certification sizz and I'm a certified essential 8 assessor. I serve my community as a Gold Coast SEC talks and besides coordinator as well as an AWSN chapter lead for the last two years. I've also been one of the facilitators of the tangible uplift program helping other women to pass the certification. I'm also honored to have been recognized

as the 2025 OSERT diversity inclusion champion and the 2024 best security mentor at both the ASA and the Australian Women in Security Awards. I was also recently nominated for the Gold Coast Women in Business Awards and became an awardee of merit. But honestly, these awards are not the finish line. They are a reminder of why visibility and mentorship matter. Because in cyber, success isn't about what you build. It's about who you lift up along the way. And that's why we're here today to talk about what it means to thrive in a technical role when the systems and cultures weren't designed with us in mind. While Paula discovered her passion for computers early on, my journey into tech

looked a little different. I wasn't the classic computer nerd growing up. Sure, I played video games, but because I didn't build my own PC or play League of Legends, my male friends never saw me as a real geek. Whenever tech discussions came up at school, I would get laughed at or dismissed, as if my interest just didn't count. That sense of exclusion only made me more determined. I pushed myself to learn everything I could, driven to prove that I belonged. That persistence eventually led me to cyber security, a field where curiosity, grit, and a love of problem solving truly pay off. Today, I work as an associate security consultant at Vulcus, where I get to break things for a living,

ethically, of course. My work spends spans pen testing, security assessments, and helping clients strengthen their defense in a way that's practical and human focused. Outside of work, I'm an active member of the cyber security community, volunteering at local events, mentoring students, and staying connected through meetups like tech talks and the Australian women in security network for which I am now Gold Coast chapter lead. For me, thriving in cyber security isn't just about mastering the tools. It's about building a community where everyone feels welcome to learn, share, and grow. Because when people can see themselves in this field, that's when interest turns into opportunity.

So, let's start what it felt like walking into those early rooms. By high school in 1991, I was only one of a handful of girls in my computer studies class. Same computers, so the same technology I'd been using since I was 8. I outperformed all of my classmates and knew more about the than the math teacher taking the class. Epic nerd badge secured. I went on to Polytech in the technical stream of business computing and was the only woman in the room. The men all older and all retraining from other careers at start were first to quick off were quick to offer help to start assuming I would struggle. But the reality, I didn't just

keep up, I topped the class. But still, I learned one undeni one of one of the first lessons in tech. You couldn't just be good, you had to be undeniable. And the theme carried on into my professional career. The assumptions shifted but never disappeared. I built deep technical capability across IT and cyber security, running projects, leading operations, delivering at scale, and while quietly dodging stereotypes and second-guessing. Early on in my career, I joined managed IT services. Weeks later, the new general manager was appointed. He told me face tof face, I would have never hired you. I already had 5 years experience and was only staff member with an IT degree. Over time, he went from grudging manager to proudly

introducing me as our female engineer, as if that was somehow his achievement. So, the bar moves, but the bias lingers. And I watched my male colleagues take family breaks with little scrutiny. Their skills were assumed to stay sharp. But women returning from maternity leave, they face subtle and sometimes not so subtle doubts about skill atrophy. I'm not a parent, but I've seen brilliant women navigate inflexible systems while balancing caregiving. And it also became clear to me that tech does not account for the full lives that women lead. And there's a part that no one ever talks about, and that's menopause. While I personally had had an easier time of it than some, I've seen firsthand how it can be a massive,

debilitating issue for some women in leadership in critical roles. Imagine leading an incident response or a major incident while battling severe symptoms with no language, no support, and no understanding. And it's another layer of invisible labor and pressure that many women carry in silence. Walking into a room has never been just about showing up and doing the job. It's about doing the job while carrying the weight of all the assumptions, internal and external. Navigating life's natural transitions in environments that often don't acknowledge them.

For me, walking into the room came with its own set of challenges. All throughout high school, I loved computers, but I never imagined I'd actually work in tech. I thought, "Who am I kidding?" When I started university, I actually enrolled in engineering. It wasn't until one of my professors noticed how much I enjoyed the computing subjects and with some not so subtle encouragement and a reminder of my strong dislike for physics convinced me to switch to IT. When I moved into it, I was one of only two girls in my year. That fact wasn't lost on me. It made me feel both exposed and determined. But despite the imbalance, it finally felt like I had found my

place. I love the work, the logic, the creativity, the problem solving. My grades were strong. And for the first time, I thought, "Yes, this is where I belong." But that excitement didn't last long. Instead of being recognized for my effort and curiosity, I found myself constantly questioned. Every detail of my work was scrutinized in ways my male classmates never experienced. They were assumed to be capable. I had to prove it over and over again. That pressure built quickly. Even though I was doing very well academically, I didn't feel like I belonged anymore. By the end of my first trimester, I dropped out. Not because I lacked ability, but because I couldn't see myself thriving in that environment.

I tried studying another field, but I just did not enjoy it. I remember confiding in my uncle, telling him I wanted to pursue it, but was afraid I would fail or I just wouldn't fit in. He told me that most people are faking it until they make it anyways, and that instead of finding reasons why I wouldn't succeed, I should focus on learning as much as I could. So, I read a few inspirational quotes on Pinterest, dusted myself off, and went back. But the culture hadn't changed. Throughout university, my work was continuously double-checked by male classmates, while their work went unquestioned when I raised concerns. I remember one particular moment a male teammate had written a piece of code that wasn't

functioning correctly. I pointed out the issue and suggested a fix, but he flat out refused to believe me. Only when another male teammate confirmed what I had said did he finally accept it. That moment really stuck with me. Not just because of the code, but because it revealed who was believed in a room full of men. It chipped away at my confidence. I felt like a token, like I was only there to tick a diversity box in the class. And I really internalized that bias. So for me, walking into the room wasn't just about showing up to lectures or submitting assignments. It was about carrying the weight of self-doubt while being visibly different and choosing again and again to stay

anyway.

So once you've walked into those rooms, the next question is how do you stay? How do you keep showing up when the assumptions don't go away? And for me, it came down to two things. Leaning into the craft and refusing let to let other people define limits of my capability. I doubled down technically. I didn't just learn the tools, I mastered the systems. I wanted to be the person in the room who knew her stuff so well. There was no easy way to dismiss me. Every certification, every project, every leadership role, it wasn't about chasing titles. It was about building unshakable credibility. And it was very intentional when I stepped out of the shadows to become

more visible to show women that there was a space for them in technical roles in IT and cyber security. I also went hard on the credentials vendors including Microsoft and AWS and the SISM like it or not sometimes a piece of paper stops the doubt before it starts. And here's the secret. It's not just about the skills. It's about confidence. Not the fake kind, not the stand tall and bluff your way through it kind, but the kind of confidence that comes from the time spent in the trenches solving problems that no one else can touch. It's the moment when the self-doubt whispers to you, have you have I done enough and you can answer yourself, yes,

in fact, I've done more than most. But here's the kicker. Once you start owning your craft, the bias does not disappear. But it does lose its power because suddenly you're not just the diversity higher. You're the person in the team that's needed in the crisis room, at the whiteboard, and at the decision-making table. Overcoming those early challenges meant making a conscious decision. If I was going to stay in this field, I needed to build a foundation that no one could take away from me. I knew I couldn't change how people perceived me overnight, but I could make sure my skills spoke louder than their doubts. That started with self-study. I spent evenings and weekends working through tutorials,

tackling online labs, and experimenting until things finally made sense. Sometimes I would spend hours just trying to figure out why a piece of code wasn't running or why a network configuration had failed. It was frustrating, but it was also empowering because each time I solved a problem on my own, I built a little more confidence in my ability to figure things out. Mastering the basics became my turning point. networking, operating systems, coding fundamentals. I treated them as my toolkit. I wanted to be able to not just use them, but understand them deeply enough to explain them clearly to others. Once I had those building blocks, moving into more advanced areas didn't feel so intimidating. But maybe

the most important lesson that I learned wasn't technical at all. It was that I could make mistakes and still belong here. For a long time, I saw every gap in my knowledge as proof that I wasn't good enough. that not knowing something meant I didn't deserve to be in the room. But eventually, I realized that being wrong didn't mean I was incapable. It meant I was still learning. In cyber security, no one knows everything. The landscape changes too fast for that. The real strength comes from being willing to admit when you don't know something and then doing the work to find it out. Once I accepted that, everything shifted. I stopped chasing perfection and started focusing on progress. I

learned that persistence mattered more than perfection. That curiosity, resilience, and the willingness to keep showing up even when I didn't have all the answers were just as valuable as technical skills. I stopped being afraid of not knowing and started to see the power in saying, "I don't know yet." So for me, building technical accumment wasn't just about learning skills. It was about building a mindset that I can make mistakes, that I don't need to know everything, that it's okay not to be perfect, and that asking questions doesn't make me less capable. That mindset is what gave me confidence not to just survive in this field, but to grow in it, and to help others realize

that they belong, too, even when they're still figuring things out.

Cyber security is demanding. Incidents don't respect calendars. Context switching is constant and the scrutiny can be relentless. To be in cyber security and especially for women, building your own personal resilience is crucial. For me, resilience isn't a buzz word. It's a non-negotiable survival strategy. And while I'll share what works for me, the key is that individuals need to find what works for them, whether that's faith, a hobby, or something else entirely. My approach is simple and it's non-negotiable. And first is exercise. I took up running at 43. Proof it's never too late. And I now run three days a week. I do YouTube yoga at least twice a week and I walk to work another three days a week. That

consistent movement for me is critical. It's where I burn off the stress and I clear my head. And it's not just about the physical health. It's a mental reset. And just as vital as taking time for myself in a field where the threats never sleep, it's easy to feel like that you shouldn't either. But stepping away and truly disconnecting, it's essential. A quiet coffee, painting my nails, playing with my dog. Um, it's about recharging so I come back sharper and less likely to make mistakes because I'm running on fumes. and I stick to two very unsexy fundamentals. I make sure I eat properly and I get enough sleep. If I skip meals, I get hangry and I cannot

focus. If I short change my sleep, I get snappy and anxious and neither is fun. Fuel and rest are part of the job and they're not a luxury. And finally, my secret weapon, a dark and totally not safe for work sense of humor. If life isn't fun, why are we here? Yes, it's inappropriate, but it's a pressure release, and it reminds me not to take myself too seriously, even when the stakes are high. It's how I stay sane. This isn't about being bulletproof. It's about having a toolkit to bounce back. You can't pour from an empty cup, and you can't defend an organization on an empty tank. Personal resilience is how you make sure you're not just surviving

in this field, but genuinely thriving.

As Paula said, sometimes we forget that resilience isn't about being tough all the time. It's about taking care of yourself so you can actually keep showing up. You can't succeed if you're burnt out. Go easy on yourself. Forgive yourself when you drop the ball because it happens to everyone. For me, resilience looks like balance. It's making time for things that have absolutely nothing to do with work. Spending time with friends, going outside, baking cookies, playing D and D, walking the dog, or just switching off for a while. Moving your body helps, too. Doesn't have to be a marathon. Even a quick walk can reset your head after a long day. I've learned that your hobbies, your downtime, and the things

that make you laugh aren't distractions. They're fuel. That what help you bounce back from the tough days and remind you that you're more than your job title or the next deadline. In cyber, it's so easy to feel that you have to constantly be on. But resilience by design means protecting your energy and setting boundaries. Embracing this allows you to continue to be a skilled and effective cyber professional.

So, walking into the room is one part of the story, but what happens next is just as important. How do we build that bench for others? When I transitioned to cyber security after decades in IT, I wasn't starting over. It was bringing everything with me. Years of technical depth, problem solving, lived experience of being underestimated, and hard earned resilience. The foundation gave me both the confidence and the urgency to carve out pathways for others who were being overlooked. One initiative I'm particularly proud of is the award-winning cyber skills enrichment program where I was the program manager. Its purpose was simple. To create a structured and inclusive pathway into cyber and especially for those who didn't fit the so-called

traditional mold. Because I knew from experience that talent doesn't just come from one pipeline. It comes from every direction if we build the right entry points. So a little over a year ago through the cyber skills enrichment program, I first met Alyssa when she applied. While looking through hundreds of résumés, her one struck me. Here was a young woman who had worked in retail and was studying IT. I put her on the short list. My boss took one look at it and said, "No, no IT skills." I saw grit, resilience, and persistence. I completely ignored my boss, as a good employee always does, and I got her in for an interview. Within 10 minutes, she

was given a placement in the program. And the success stories through those chosen to participate proved the point. women who had been dismissed as non-technical neurode divergent candidates who thrived given once given flexibility in the right environment time and again once they had mentorship sponsorship and a place where their skills were recognized they flourished but here's the thing even while leading even after a win like that I still carried the whisper of doubt was it enough had I still done enough and it's an almost universal question for women in technical fields and the reality is often more than with most. And that's why building the bench matters because each of us standing here isn't just

proving ourselves. We're building the future scaffolding for the next generation so they don't have to face the same barriers.

And from my side, building the bench meant moving from survival to contribution. Once I had built my own foundations, I realized that thriving wasn't just about proving myself anymore. It was about making sure others could thrive alongside me. The turning point for me was deciding that if I had to work this hard to claim space, I didn't want the next person to feel quite so alone in doing it. At university, that meant speaking up in group projects, not just for myself, but for others whose ideas were being constantly overlooked. I started stepping into leadership roles, not because I felt completely ready, but because I knew that representation mattered. The more visible I was, the easier it became for others to see that

they could lead, too. I also began pushing myself into spaces outside of class, industry events, meetups, and networking groups. At first, I joined just to learn, but what I found was a community. Organizations like AWSN gave me a chance to connect with women at all different stages of their careers. Those conversations reminded me that none of us succeed alone and that sharing knowledge and encouragement can be just as powerful as any technical skill. When it came time to step into the workforce, those lessons really mattered. Getting your first job in tech, especially as a woman, often means applying for roles you don't feel completely qualified for. That's exactly what I did. I think a lot

of women feel like we need to tick every box or earn every certification before we even dare to apply. But that simply is not true. One night in my final year of uni, I came across an email about the cyber skills enrichment program. I was studying software development at the time, but as I read through the details, something about it just clicked. Sounded interesting, meaningful, different. Then I looked at the requirements and realized I didn't meet a single one. I was too young, had no real transferable skills, no real IT experience. But then I thought, why not? The worst that could happen was that they just ignore me. But instead, I got a reply. And that reply

was from Paula. Finally, someone saw my potential, saw my curiosity and determination, and most importantly made space for me. Meeting Paula through that program was one of the most pivotal moments in my life. For the first time, I could clearly see what a long fulfilling career in tech and cyber could look like. Having a mentor who not only understood the barriers, but had overcome them showed me that the path forward was real and that I had value to offer, too. After my internship, I was offered a short-term contract role with cyber audit team as a security analyst, which then led me to a position with the Gold Coast City Council as a cyber trainee. And now I'm proud to say I'm

working in my dream role as an associate security consultant with Vulcus. And I got every one of those roles by applying before I felt ready. So now when I think about building the bench, it's about lifting as you climb, recommending someone for an opportunity, making introductions, or simply saying out loud their contribution matters. It's not about doing everything perfectly. It's about creating a ripple effect so the next generation doesn't have to fight the same invisible battles alone.

Of course, building for individuals isn't enough if the culture is broken. Unpacking workplace cultures designed around traditional linear careers, rigid hours, performance reviews, bias towards extraversion or visibility, team bonding that excludes, all of it speaks volumes. None of that maps to a modern high performing cyber team. If we want to retain great people and get the best from them, we have to design for the reality and not the nostalgia. One of the biggest myths in our industry is that by supporting flexibility for parents and caregivers, it's some sort of compromise. It's not a compromise. It's a catalyst for retention. Every time we design a role around rigid hours or outdated assumptions, we lose incredible talent who simply can't

contort their lives into a narrow shape. While we make when we make room for flexibility, we don't just keep women. We keep expertise, innovation, and diversity of thought. And then there's merit. We often hear hiring managers say, "We only hire on merit." But when you scratch beneath the surface, what they usually mean by merit is familiar. People who look like them, think like them, went to the same schools as them, and they followed the same career path. That's not merit. That's comfort. But here's something we often don't talk about enough. Bias isn't only built into systems. It lives within each of us, too. I've spent my entire career challenging assumptions about women in tech and still I catch myself sometimes

carrying those very assumptions I'm fighting. The work isn't just out there. It sometimes and sorry the work isn't just out there. The biases exist in each of us. Inclusion isn't about hiring differently. It's about thinking differently. And that starts with catching ourselves in the moment and choosing better. recognizing and challenging the mindsets we carry, not just in the systems we work in. And while we're at it, we need to stop penalizing nonlinear career paths. Caregiving illness migration retraining, they aren't red flags. They're indicators of resilience, persistence, and the kind of adaptability that cyber depends on. And we can't talk about retention without also talking about life stages that have been ignored for way too long. Return to

work programs after career breaks, part-time and job share roles, and structured re-entry ramps are great ways to keep hard one talent. Creating a menopausalware workplace is as simple as enabling temperature control, allowing uniform flexibility, leave options, and a short guidance note for managers. They make a disproportionate difference, and they cost almost nothing. They're not nice to have, they're retention levers. And the same applies to teen culture. If social connection always equals late night drinks, you've quietly excluded carers, non-drinkers, and anyone that's got a long commute. If you rotate the format, plan in advance, and you'll be surprised how quickly engagement improves. The truth is, when we redefine merit to value pathways, transferable skills, neurodeiverse thinking, and nonlinear

careers, inclusion naturally follows. Because the best cyber defense teams are not made of carbon copies. They're built from people who bring different strengths to the table. People who see the risks, the patterns, and the solutions that others miss.

Challenging the language we use is one of the first steps towards real cultural change. Take the phrase culture fit. On the surface, there's merit in wanting someone who connects well with the team and shares core values. That kind of fit helps people collaborate and thrive. But it's a slippery slope. Too often fit becomes code for familiar used to exclude people who don't mirror the dominant group rather than to recognize how well someone contributes, communicates, and builds rapport. I don't want to fit in if it means blending in or erasing what makes me different. I want to add something new. And that idea of adding rather than fitting goes beyond language. It's about mindset. When we spend so much time

trying to blend in, it's easy to start measuring ourselves and others by that same narrow standard that we've been trying to escape. I've caught myself before noticing other women in the in a technical role and feeling that flicker of doubt about their skill only to stop and think, "Wait, where did that come from?" It's confronting to realize that even when we fought so hard to belong, we can still carry some of the same biases we've faced. But awareness is where change begins. Every time we notice and challenge those thoughts, we are rewiring something deeper. Both in ourselves and in the culture around us. Other women are not competition. They are our peers. They can become our

mentors teachers advocates and representation in spaces that haven't always seen us. We need each other, especially in a world that has taught us to see scarcity where there's actually strength in solidarity. And that belief in solidarity has to show up in the systems we build, especially in hiring. Getting into these roles isn't easy, particularly when you're often the only women in the room. Sitting on a panel of interviewers, all men, can be really intimidating. You become hyper aware of how you sound, how you present, even how you sit. But culture doesn't shift all at once. It changes one conversation, one hiring decision, and one opportunity at a time. I think it's also important to acknowledge that inclusion looks

different for everyone. The barriers I've faced as a woman in tech aren't the same as those someone else might face, but the feeling of being other can be just as real. That's why our approach to culture has to be broad and empathetic, not just focus on on one group or experience. This perspective also highlights the importance of neuroinclusive practices. As someone with ADHD, I know how a simple task can feel monumental when expectations aren't clear. Vague instructions or shifting goals don't just slow you down. They can make you feel really isolated, like you're falling behind while everyone else moves ahead. But when teams provide clarity, written instructions, defined goals, structured communication, it's transformative. It allows people like me

to focus on the work, not the guesswork. It levels the playing field. So, what's the bigger picture? Culture isn't something that just happens by default. It's something we design intentionally when we design it to value difference rather than conformity. We don't just support women or neurody divergent people. We build teams that are stronger, smarter, and more resilient.

So far, we've talked about entering the room, building the bench, building personal resilience, and redesigning culture. But the last piece, and the one that ties it all together, is visibility. Throughout my career, there have been more times than I can count when I have been the only woman in the room, or one of just a handful. During my first job in IT in a university library, I was sent on a Windows NT course. The trainer kept saying things like, "You know a lot for a librarian." Even though he was told I was the IT technician. At an early Microsoft event back in the 2000s during the keynote, they proudly welcomed the 3,000 attendees, including the six women. And you'd hope things had

changed, and they have a little, but still not enough. Women may now make up around 17% of those working in cyber security and the number of women in technical roles is even smaller. In the last few years when I went to my first tech sec talks on the go coast I scanned the crowd and I thought right it's just me then. And at a cloud security alliance meeting in Brisbane a couple of years ago there were 100 people in the room and I counted five women. A man at my table turned to me instead of saying what do you do or where do you work? He said, "Why are you here?" And that's not the first time I've been

asked that in a professional setting. And there the technical vendor training, Sentinel One, Microsoft, Foret, in the housekeeping section. It's painfully clear that they don't usually need to mention where the women's toilets are, and sometimes they don't even know. It becomes like a special announcement, like we're mythical creatures needing directions to Nania. But on the plus side, events like these is the only time there's never a cue for the woman's Lou. And moments stick with you like that. They're funny, but they also hit a nerve because no one sees us. Nothing changes. Until someone sees a woman leading a sock, running an incident response, or delivering a deep technical demo, deep dive technical demo, it doesn't occur to

them it's normal. And visibility changes that. For me, public speaking has been a way to multiply my impact. One talk can validate, inspire, or even change a career path. But the most fulfilling part of my career hasn't been standing on the stage. It's been mentoring. And I don't just mean sharing technical skills. It's about sharing space. Standing beside someone, opening doors, making introductions, and saying out loud, their voice matters. And for many, that's the difference between staying in the field or walking away. I'm intentional about sharing opportunities, passing on open roles, putting emerging practitioners forward for panels and projects, and making warm introductions across my network. I surface people's wins in daylight. I name the people who did the work so that

their impact is visible when it counts. Making space for those coming after me is a practice, not a slogan. If I am invited to speak and I can't, I'll recommend someone newer. If I am leading, I'll co-lead and I'll bring someone with me. If a door opens for me, I wedge it so the next person doesn't have to push so hard. Because visibility isn't about ego. It's about proof. Every time you step up and you show others what's possible, you're saying this path exists and you can walk it, too. Visibility isn't a prize that you earn at the end. It's a tool you use along the way to bring others with you. And the more we use it, the more the

industry changes shape. The rooms get more diverse and the conversations get richer. And eventually walking into a room without women in it will feel weird. So take up space, speak, mentor, post your wins, share the mic, sponsor someone. And the spotlight is not limited. It's exponential when you share it. The more of us who stand here and stay visible, the more we make it impossible to ignore that we belong here. And honestly, this whole field works better when we all do.

Visibility doesn't have to mean doing something huge or perfectly polished. Your first meetup talk, your first presentation, your first time raising your hand in a room full of experts. It doesn't have to be profound. It just has to be yours. Honestly, standing here today sharing my story, I'm terrified. I'm naturally an introvert. Networking and public speaking don't come easily to me at all. But I'm doing it anyway, and that's the point. Visibility is about stepping into the discomfort, even when it scares you, because that's how others get to see what's possible. When we see marginalized or underrepresented groups standing confidently in these spaces, it changes what belonging looks like. It plants a seed for someone else to think,

"Hey, maybe there's a place for me, too." When I first started out in tech, I had no women around me to lean on. My professors at uni, all men. My friends in tech, all men. The companies I stalked on LinkedIn, all men. Warto-wall men. I didn't see myself reflected anywhere. And that made it harder to imagine a future where I could belong to. So sharing your jo journey, your questions, your mistakes, your very awkward moments gives permission for others to do the same. It makes the invisible path visible. And sometimes showing up scared is exactly what makes your impact real.

When you're the only one in the room who looks like you, it's easy to be seen as a symbol before you're seen as a professional. You can't control the biases you walk into, but you can control and set expectations, communicate, and frame your impact. This isn't about performing perfection. It's about clearing creating clarity and evidence so that people have fewer excuses to underestimate you. These days when I onboard a new customer, I set the expectations early and in writing. At kickoff, I'm clear on what my role is, what success looks like, and where I need input from others. It sounds simple, but it works. It reduces the ambiguity, which is where the bias loves to hide. And it keeps everyone focused

on outcomes and not optics. When the goal posts are clear up front, they're much harder to move later. Earlier in my career, I spent way too long doing the office housework, taking notes, chasing admin, and making sure everything ran smoothly while others got the spotlight. That's fair when you're the most junior person in the room, but as you progress, it shouldn't always default to you. Be mindful of where your time goes and redirect it towards work that builds capability and visibility. You don't have to know everything, but you definitely don't have to bluff your way through. Take ownership, follow up, and close the loop. Calm, concise follow-ups, artifacts of competence that travel further than being the loudest

voice in the room. And be proud of your accomplishments. Surface them deliberately. Keep a simple log if you have to. That's not arrogance. That's evidence. And your impact should never be invisible. I've leared to run towards the problems that others avoid. And I love the hard stuff. Vulnerability remediation, the gnarly incidents, and the mess that no one wants to touch because those are the moments where you build your reputation. Volunteer for the project that no one wants. Take the call that no one else will and tackle the client that everyone dreads and then make your impact visible. That's how trust is built. And here's the truth. You don't have to fix the whole room to shift how the room

sees you. Set expectations in daylight. Write things down. Design your workload towards impact. Turn feedback into a road map and surface the results. If you do that consistently and you move from token to trusted, not because the bias, the bias vanished, but because you've engineered around it and left a trail of proof that's too solid to ignore.

As we wrap up today, remember this. Thriving in technical roles was never about fitting the mold. It's about breaking it. The challenges are real. Bias, doubt, stereotypes, but so are the opportunities. Confidence in tech isn't about never questioning yourself. It's about showing up, speaking up, and continuing anyway. When we make space for different voices and design cultures that value difference, we don't just help women succeed. We strengthen the entire field. Every woman who steps forward, every mentor who shares their time, and every leader who redefes what good looks like helps shapes the help shape the future of cyber security. It's also important to recognize that men are essential partners in this change. The men who challenge their own biases and

speak up when they see bias around them help set a new standard. The reality is men listen to men. And when they use their influence to uplift women and call out sexism, others take notice. So lift each other up, bring others on the journey with you. Keep receipts of your impact. Back yourself, take up space, and don't wait for permission. Thank you to everyone who came out today. And please feel free, oh, it's already changed. To connect with us on LinkedIn. Thank you. Any

questions?

Go on. First of all, I'd like to thank you for sharing your stories. It made me feel uh mine is not unique. All the things that you've said like Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> I saw a few nods. Yeah. Yeah. And uh I'm really glad. Okay. So when I first started going to security conferences that was way back I think 28 2018. Yeah. Or 2017 that was in Melbourne. Uh it was Roxcon. Yeah. And then uh there were like very few women there. So we got to know each other. And then uh the next year one of the women I met there became a speaker. >> Okay. Nushin, I think you know her. Yeah. And then and I said I also want to

like speak that I don't know what to talk about. And then he and then she said I wanted to have more women speakers and uh with AWSN's uh you know help and cy uh women speak cyber. So there was that project freerman. So for everyone here who's not aware and like to have like this uh public speaking skills there is that project called project freedman. So uh um one of my persistent uh issues is about the use of inclusive language. And this is something that I've always had challenges because I've been told that in Australia calling guys guys like everyone. It's like it's everyone but it's not. And I've asked people like men I know that they're heterosexual men. So

if you're a guy would you date another guy? And then you're like what? What? I had like someone like tell me like what do you mean I don't understand what you mean and someone even pulled up like hey this mean guys like everyone so it's it and also because I'm speaking from a place where it was like uh a trauma wherein I guys was used to explic uh explicitly exclude me so I'm not sure about your experience have you had like similar experience how you handled it I confess I use the phrase guys too but I think you just have to think about if you were talking to a team of men, would you say, "Hey, girls."

When you flip it around the other way, 100%. I know. I would love to say to my sock team, "Hey ladies, let's go for tea." >> Or I guess like say I just say there's other more inclusive term like team >> everyone, folks. Yeah, >> people peeps. Yeah, >> just everybody. It's inclusive. Hi everybody. Even saying Good afternoon men and women or ladies and gentlemen. You're excluding by that people in your audience. So, hi everybody. Everybody. And I think it's one of those things and I see um a lot more recently some of the language changing. Um even some of the the cyber phrases we're now seeing not man in the middle for example. Why can't your threat actually

be a woman? So being more inclusive in our language in all its forms. Um I think we have to be mindful yeah just the phrases we we say um when we're writing documents there's just so many different things and it's not until you stop to reflect sometimes that you realize that you are being yeah exclusive in your language >> no comment from >> and we all have names too so I mean if it's a small team you can actually use names >> I was just going to add too I think like in our culture especally Especially being Australian, sometimes we use oh mate or guys or things like that very casually. And I think if you're just

open and receptive if someone says to you, oh hey, I don't like when you refer to me as hey girl, hey ladies, and becoming more aware, that's like a huge impact as well. So just being receptive to like when someone calls that out. >> The one thing I hate more than anything that drives me mad is my name is Paula. I don't know how many people get an email from me and go, "Hi Paul." because I think my email address is Paul A. And no, I don't play rugby. Someone actually asked me that, too. I'm a Kiwi, but I don't play rugby. >> I I don't have a question as such, but I just wanted to say I appreciated your

point about performance reviews, you know, favoring extroverts. I mean, I've gotten in a lot of trouble at several jobs in the past just for not being very friendly with my boss when that had nothing to do with my job, which I was doing fine. And so, I do wish we'd be more aware of that in general. So, >> I think even as women sometimes we get judged by just what we wear to work if there's no uniform. So, yeah, I mean, I remember crawling around under the desk as I do in it, plugging cables in, and the client literally said, "Oh, it's a long time since I had a woman crawling around on the floor for me." And I'm

like, "Okay, that's just crossed the line that didn't even need to be there. He didn't need to say anything." And my boss when I went, he was like completely horrified. It was like immediate phone call. We're not dealing with you anymore. That's completely inappropriate and my staff don't feel safe. But I also had issues where I got blamed for not setting up the scanner when I was doing a migration on a computer. And I'm like, "My boss got the call. She never set up the scanner." And I said, "What scanner?" "Oh, the one that's in the cupboard." >> So would there have been a complaint if it had been a guy that had gone along? I

had people say, "Do you know what you're doing?" No, they sent a complete idiot to do your it because that's who the company hires. It's just it's constant. Even my dad asked me when I installed back in the day a CD player on my mom's computer. My dad walked in from work and he's like, "Do you know what you're doing?" I'm like, "How many years do you think I've been working in it? Do you actually understand what I do for a job?" And so it's it's in all of us. And I like I mentioned our biases. I had a NBN technician come to my home. I did not expect it to be a woman. So when she

got out of her van and got her ladder and was up on the roof and through the ceiling, that for me challenged my own bias cuz I never would have assumed in a million years it would be a woman show up. So we all have it. >> Um, sorry, this is primarily asking Alyssa, but I would also appreciate your input as well, Paula. Um, uh, you mentioned earlier that when you found you were like pretty much the only one in a particular setting that you felt it helped drive you further to kind of uh, perform as like as to the best ability. How does one uh shift their mindset from I'm the only woman in this era,

therefore there's no point trying to I'm the only woman in this era, therefore I want to strive to do better. And I guess by extension, how would I as a man help support someone shift their mindset in that way? >> All right, let me break this into a few parts so I can keep up with what you said. I think firstly I developed a really strong sense of spite. So when I initially thought I was like I don't belong here eventually it started to piss me off and I'm like oh my god I'm going to make sure I belong here. This is kind of related was I used to have really bad imposter syndrome. Like I'd

come into these rooms and think oh my god I totally suck. I'm an idiot and everyone can tell I'm an idiot. For me I started to give it a name. Sorry if anyone's called Bob but my imposter syndrome is called Bob. So when I'd hear Bob in my head thinking, "Oh, Alyssa, you totally suck." I'd be like, "Oh, piss off Bob." Like, "I don't want to deal with you." So that also kind of drove me. And I think as a man in cyber security or in this technical field, it's just really highlighting the wins of your female peers. You know, if they have a good point or they contribute something, really, really highlight it and just back them up. If they say a

point that you agree with, you can really validate their input. So I think it's just showcasing their talent and their contribution to the team. Um yeah, >> I think one of the things that many of us have probably experienced is we have an idea um or we we say something perhaps in a professional setting and it kind of gets bypassed and then a man at the table and a couple of comments later will say the same thing and everyone go yeah great idea and you'll be like but I just said that. So as a man saying oh yes that was the point that Paula just made so yeah great thanks for reiterating that those sorts of things.

So um also backing up women when they do have great thoughts and concepts and ideas um because that goes a long way for helping their representation and also calling well not calling out but highlighting women's accomplishments in other groups where the women aren't there. So making sure that you are calling out their accomplishments. So great work done by whoever. I do it with my junior staff as well um because my boss can sometimes a bit be a bit hard on them. So, if one of them's done great work, I make sure when I'm having my one-on-one to say, "This person did a really great job on this," just so he knows because when it comes to time to

salary reviews, promotions, those sorts of things, those are the things that are going to get remembered. Um, and so it it comes into play for women, anyone who's junior and their roles, it's it's tough out there. So, be kind to everybody. >> Really sorry, just back to what you said. I think also a lot of the work has to be done in like the locker room chat that happens with men. It's not just how you protect women when they're in front of you. It's what's said behind their back. I can't even say how many times I've heard, "Oh, this woman got the role because she slept with the boss or because she did something like that."

So, I think as soon as you call it out when it's just you and the guys and say, "Hey, this isn't normal normal chatter." Like, "Oh, she slept with the boss. Okay, explain to me why you said that." Like make it not funny anymore. I think that also helps change the narrative about women achieving these really highly technical roles. >> And some workplaces are extremely toxic for women. Um bad behaviors. I mean, you might think it goes under the radar, but you see the inappropriate comments going through the team's chat. Um to the the point of pornography in some workplaces being completely acceptable. As a woman, that does not feel like a safe space. And who you going to go to? HR. Most of

these organizations don't have anybody in HR that's gonna give a anyway. So I think you've got to find the right place as well. And I think for women, we need to be really careful about that. For a long time, I avoided events where I was the only woman in the room and they were serving the, as you always see at these events, beer and pizza. I do not want to be the only woman in a room with a bunch of men who are drinking alcohol. That is not a safe space potentially for me. So being mindful about how you actually um what your culture is before you start looking to bring women in is really important.

>> Question. >> Um yeah, I have a bunch of questions. Uh >> yeah. Um first of all, thank you very much for your presentation. I'd like to connect but your code doesn't work. But that we could probably deal with that afterwards. Ah yeah it's fine sometimes it never works. I know that. Uh but yeah just say yeah I work in it actually in a team where we are all men. Uh we had one woman but it's actually not a good place for women that have children but yeah that's probably so something I'd like to ask is like uh there are sometimes where it doesn't match it doesn't matter how much you do it's like they are not going to give you

the recognition. So how will you have you ever have this like I don't care or quiet quitting and and also related to that when you get like too frustrated what's your strategy either to introduce humor to call them off or even sometimes just send everyone to off directly. >> I think for me if I get really frustrated for them I just make it really awkward. Like I had someone make a joke about me. I asked him a question and this was when I was at uni and he replied back to me like, "Oh, do you do only fans? Is that why you're asking?" And in front of the whole team, I thought, "Oh, can you explain to me why

you think I do Only Fans?" And he got really, really uncomfortable. So, I think sometimes the best way is making them feel so awkward and so uncomfortable and playing dumb saying, "Can you explain that to me? Like, why do you think I'm not capable?" That kind of helps me that way. Yeah. when I've had experiences where um someone said like something inappropriate or it's just a that sort of environment. This often where my humor comes into play. Um so I'll do one of two things. One, I'll make a joke or two, if someone said something that's completely inappropriate, I'll just take it way past the line. Um because fight fire with fire. Um if I can shock somebody

that is like I win. Um so that's one of my techniques.

chemistry and accounting. So I had no IT experience and then I I was so frustrated and

Okay. And then

he was struggling.

not working. It's okay. Of course,

you guys are so much nicer to men than I am. Um, when they say something really egregious, I don't treat it with humor. Sometimes I do if I know the guys, but uh a lot of times I will in front, especially if they say it in front of of a crowd, I say, "We're going to take what you just said and we're going to set that aside and this is your chance to say something else." And that really puts them on notice that they have really overstepped the line. Right? I'm in management, so it may be a little bit different for me, but um that's effective whether you're a woman or a man. Um, and I will say men, uh, I'll

reinforce what you've said. Um, men that don't listen to women aren't going to listen to us. And the literally the best thing that you can do is say, as Carlo said, as Alyssa said, as Paula said, and then repeat verbatim what we have just said. I I own my own consulting company. I was struggling to close some deals last year even and I had a friend of mine show up to the sales meeting and literally repeat verbatim what I said and I closed 150,000 in two two deals. Right. So don't underestimate the power that you have as men and your voice and helping us. >> Yeah. When I was a student, my best friend in my class was someone that was

the same age as my parent. He was a older guy. Retrain him. He had kids my age, so he completely respected someone coming straight from school and studying. Um, and I mean, we'd sit in the back of the class and we'd giggle and look at jokes online and stuff and then he'd go home and help me fix my bike. So, he was just a really nice fatherly figure. And so, finding allies is really important. Um, and I would suggest you do that whichever job you've got because they're the people that are going to speak up for you and respect you and um, potentially take down some of that trash talk that can happen in the background.

There are definitely good men out there. Um, I just had a question about when you guys were juniors. How did you guys um transition from all of the entrylevel tasks that they would give you to some more tasks where you wanted to upskill yourself and show what your capabilities were? Sometimes I would just do it without asking. Like it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission. So if I saw there was a task, especially when I worked at cyber audit team that had been sitting there for a while, if I knew I had the capability and I knew I wasn't going to bring down their entire website, I would just go and do it. So I

think sometimes they don't want to give you a lot of work. So they don't want to overwhelm you or they don't think you're capable. So taking that initiative and just trying to do the extra bit you can really can help upskill you. >> Do a terrible job of taking the minutes. I am the worst minute taker, but I'm a great IT and security engineer, so maybe my time should be focused on that. >> Um, I'm just going to give some advice because um I'm older than everybody here probably and I'm a I'm a senior leader in tech organizations for many years and the one thing that you need to understand is if you wait for

permission, you're never going to get anything. You've just got to go for it. The number of women who do not apply for jobs because they don't tick 100% of the boxes is ludicrous. The amount of men who apply for jobs that they've got 20% of the qualifications for an inordinate number. Apply for things. Go for it. Just don't sit back. And one of the things that happens inside organizations is you're not in the room. So decisions are being made about you and your capabilities while you're not in the room. And it's obviously a lot of the time it's not about you, it's about their perceptions of you. So they'll say, "We won't we won't send Mary to

Perth to do that project because she's got two kids." Well, Mary can make her own arrangements about her kids. Why not give her the opportunity? So the important thing is actually to find sponsors in your organization. So this is different to a mentor, somebody that is typically senior you than you and is in those rooms who can speak up for you. And that kind of advocacy is worth its weight and gold. And that's how I got my chance. This was last century. But I had these sponsors in the room who would say, "Let's give her a chance. Let's let her have an opportunity." So find sponsors as well as mentors. It's such an important thing.

One of the sayings that Alyssa and I have often joked about and we weren't sure whether we should mention it was have the confidence of a mediocre man. >> So I've said it now. Can we have please have a huge round of applause for Paula and Lissa?