Jack Daniel Keynote

one of my favorite people so we got Jack Jack Daniel Jack is the when ice age fill in the blank here for job title at tenable security he has over 20 years experience in networking system administration and I think his epic beard has well over 30 jack is a technology community activist jack is a co-founder of security besides movement and he serves on the board of directors for security besides Las Vegas and for security besides Incorporated he's also a frequent speaker at technology and security events large and small and he has co-hosted pall security weekly where I think they discussed security some times but they might do some other things on the show as well so just like

Dave this morning I also asked jack friends for a comment about him and besides Las Vegas president fan she said Jack Daniel is a misnomer of a name while gentlemen jack certainly fits this guy is much smoother and more sophisticated than any straight whiskey he's a bespoke cocktail made of the essence of community a [ __ ] of irreverence and a few dashes of humility I think most of us would probably agree that about Jack Jack is a reluctance the ISSP holds the CCF K and as Microsoft MVP for enterprise security Jack's uncommon sense security blog was named to the security bloggers Hall of Fame in 2013 and it's my honor to introduce our keynote

speaker Daniel [Applause] and now we do combat with technology

look at that no stupid speaker turns itself off so there's my presentation tip for you if you ever give presentations whatever you do wrong or your note go back into that slide deck at a hidden slide at the very beginning to remind yourself of stuff like I just did there which is this stupid speaker I'm going to use turns itself off so let's see let's turn things on let's let's make some nice yeah wallpaper I have no idea why my wife bought that painting for me honey badger clutching a cocktail I have no idea what that symbolizes okay this is where we do mortal combat with technology anyone ever feel that their love of Technology is unrequited here we go now

this is where it gets tricky because I try to use music and stuff this is this is where we argue with the technology again come on see I know go do that

see try to be clever jack look what happens where you won't see you see that did it did it let's try this again

[Music] that's called pandering by the way that's your second tip on presentation pander to the audience all right uh but first a couple of you might have seen Jeff's comment I'm going to keep this short three weeks ago we lost Becky bass if you did not know Becky I feel sorry for you she was an amazing person I won't go into depth but info mom I only got to know her in the past few years she was an amazing person she was a mentor to more people than you would believe a single person could be and how many folks in here knew Becky the new Becky well okay Becky as you know then end of your career before she passed

away at the University of South Alabama and as all good professors she left us homework the homework is for those of us that were touched by Becky to turn out to those of you that didn't raise your hands and be here to support you because that's what community is about people have come before us and been amazing and we owe it to them to continue that which is good segue into an I projects which I'm not really going to talk about but I'm going to mention this one of the things that I talk about sometimes and I've got a project called the shoulders of InfoSec it's a horrible wiki but the talks are sometimes entertaining

historical figures in our industry the folks that got us where we are and some of their stories the truth of this industry is no matter how you enter it whether you're trying to get into the industry or whether you've been in it for decades you run full-tilt trying to keep up and we rarely have a chance to look back and figure out where we came from and how we got there and that's a look back and sometimes it's great to remember the folks that came before honor them the known and the unknown sometimes it's depressing as hell to like look at the ware report for the Anderson report or the orange book and realize how far we haven't come but

anyway that's just a side project and now you are here you probably figured that out so this is that besides Boston let's see how many people are from Boston Proper here which is like all of the cool things in Boston actually in Cambridge that's that's pandering to one side of the river yeah over here on this side we have all the cool schools and all the student debt ouch but here's the key thing you're also part of all of this we're here but we're part of this these are the security b-sides venues across North America and the green dots are the places that have one's first-time events coming up Springfield Missouri and Edmonton and Alberta that's like out

there I mean calgary's out there and then you go beyond out there but here's the amazing thing you're also part of all of this this is the three hundred and twenty second security besides event since a handful of us got together and had a hacker house party con in Las Vegas in July of 2009 and it was a reaction to the over commercialization of some events and the reaction to some interesting stuff being turned down because it just didn't quite fit you know the very first b-sides was in Vegas and it was a lot of Def Con 303 Cru a bunch of others we had the most attended and most talked about a session there was a panel on

gender and gender issues and information security 2009 in July a bunch of us misogynistic hackers actually had hosted a panel that was amazing that's for those keeping score not that I believe in keeping score against the big guys but that was over five years before RSA was ready to tackle that it's content that matters to you that makes b-sides it's why these events are so fantastic these sides in the early days I quickly realized there were the three C's that I've considered the pillars of b-sides content community and conversation share good content foster conversation helped build local communities Vegas is a little different because nobody is local in Vegas and locals don't engage except for a few but it that was where you know

it really took out one of the things that we realized very quickly was there was a fourth C in that pillar which is career if you actually share a good content build community have good conversations people's careers advance and that became clearance this is the kind of what I see is the four C's if you're trying to count you don't have to 106 unique cities have held events 26 countries 28 countries have held events assuming that we count Scotland as a separate continent country which it will be soon enough thank you for exit some of the the upcoming ones yes that's me on Mar Delhi India Uganda Kampala Uganda Gibraltar Bordeaux they're planning on fall I

don't know I'm sure none of you would like to go to Bordeaux in the fall I'm sure that's terrible uh-huh and Amsterdam yeah nobody wants to go to Amsterdam me that's all right marijuana is legal in Massachusetts now right just try to buy it legally so this morning I was asked and I'll ask again how many people here is this your first b-sides event ever fantastic thank you for joining us so a lot of events have laid on you see people with the badges with alumni and whatever and the founders circle and [ __ ] like that this is a growing community a growing global community if you're growing an entity your foundation has to grow with

that everyone here is part of the founders circle welcome to the founders circle whether this is your first or fiftieth 'besides you're part of the founders circle you're part of the foundation of this community we like to we talk about participants not attendees that means you talk to people actually engage that's what it's about before I get into the actual topic I realized I was having a conversation with a friend of mine we're talking about community building and I distilled all of the essence of community building down to six words now in Boston we have so many I say we even though I've now moved south it's it's such a great community of communities the number of meetups that there are the

old Boston Computer Society for folks that have been around it was always a great region for sharing information part of it is because you may have noticed there are some pretty cool institutions of learning here we're at one that a lot of people think is cool there right so in six words some are repeated give a darn you might want to use a stronger word but you have to care about the community you're engaged in wow people actually care about stuff here people are I don't forgive me for using the word passionate but people are passionate about technology people are passionate about sharing their ideas and give people a voice and that's what 'besides does and a lot of other things

what I like about communities give people a voice of course for talking in the corporate world a lot of you have seen companies that have like community teams and they don't give what they just want you to give them money no if you give your customers a voice and then listen that builds corporate community to which some companies get but that's not really my world but I'm going to change here and get into what I want to talk about this talk shifted topic several time and I'm going to do something I don't like to do I'm going to repeat chunks of talks some of you may have seen a few of these slides but it's a message that hasn't

gotten through to enough people so now for something completely different [Music]

let's text you back watching this

[Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] that's a young Korean woman named Luna Lee I thought we would put that in there for a little break to tell you we're changing direction she M that's not where you expected that to go when you heard the the beginning of the guitar solo that's a traditional Korean instrument called Agra gyeom and she does a ton of classic rock covers blues covers on the gyeom she started to do vocals she has an elfin Korean voice that sides crazy but anyway that was just to show you we were changing direction and I think that worked she shredding on the gig I am is not normal rock lexicon but there we go so

this section is called put on your own mask before helping others we're in New England I've spent 40 years here I moved here temporarily I moved to Cape Cod temporarily in 1977 and it's interesting because we're tough we're stoic right which is an interesting word because the word stoic means one thing and the practice of stoicism needs something very different we're tough we can do stuff our technology we're going to work ourselves to do you think those people in Silicon Valley work hard no they work long hours they're just not very good so they have to work really long hours we're good and therefore we get a lot done and we work even longer hours because we're hard-working New

Englanders damn it it's a good thing we don't burn ourselves out it's a good thing we don't suffer from stress it's a good thing we don't take that stress home so I hope no one gets value from this presentation because if you don't get any value from this you aren't stressed nobody in your life is stressed nobody's suffering the things that life throws at us you're not paying attention to cable news you know yeah I don't know Oh also this laptop and this version of PowerPoint have become sentient and they heckle me in my own presentations so aim high why this topic I love my job I have an amazing job I hardly have a job at

all I have a job with a company that you know and I'm not a have been on a slide earlier but but most of my job is engaging with communities whether or not it has anything to do with the company because we actually value this community so I work at tenable network security you know what's really cool if it weren't for those of us in the space where our sales teams compete daily rapid7 and Qualis and tenable and tripwire our space sponsors more of these events bigger and smaller events puts people out that speak how many rapid7 speakers are here I mean they're across the room so it's really cool and I think it's awesome that I'm part of

this I have an amazing job but you know the reality is not everybody's job is great hello this is Danny and how psychologist Annette and Clark penny I'm sick of typing I want to quit but I don't know how I support myself if I did I ask yourself this question what is it that you really enjoy about typing are you feel bad I don't like anything about typing every morning when I get ready for work I start crying what's wrong with me you hate your work it's normal have a good day [Applause] it turns out not everybody has a great job turns out life is more than work Clark at least it ought to be so we should is

going to be prepared for ourselves friends family peers community several years ago dan gear said this and I have to thank gone sir for grabbing this quote and showing it to me security is too wide to master too deep to know and too fast to photograph and Dan said this several years ago I don't know if you've noticed it hasn't gotten easier it hasn't gotten narrower it hasn't gotten shallower it certainly hasn't slowed down so um so a couple of months ago Joey who does D F IR posted this on Twitter and after this question and here were the results fewer can D F IR have you had a case that bothered you after so as you can

see 22% lied and 40% I drink a lot no kidding really that's it the threat landscape summarized in the immortal words of Bob Dylan [Music] yes I have fun with audio clips a few times so where does that leave us well I mean we're trying to do a good job we're trying to share we're trying to move forward but we have some challenges yeah it's what's gone you know thankfully none of us are trying to defend networks with say Windows systems on them this weekend right it's not like it's a holiday weekend with a b-sides when and then the bad days look more like alright maybe that was a bit harsh so we can give you

the feline face ohm if that's better for you so how do we cope you know and not just cope we want to survive and thrive we want to be productive arguably we even want to be happy so what we're trying to do is not end up listening to this sound lying there in the bed and that sexy Johnny that they put you in machines [Music] we're hoping to actually be productive and healthy so disclaimer pay no attention to me just because I am dressed like a madman and have a giant eunuchs beard does not mean that I know anything but I do have the microphone and a clicker which makes me an expert I'm an amateur guide best I get my lost

myself here's what I know something about so one of the things that I've discovered about stress is it will destroy your memory recreational marijuana I can't lose any more short-term memory like I I want to do it but I keep forgetting to smoke it's real the first time we had some interesting family crisis many years ago my doctor who I saw a couple of days ago he's been my primary care physician since I was a teenager yes he is old like hey so you're going to notice some things going through the stuff you're going through including memory loss and it'll get better and every big stress cycle in my life since then it gets worse I bounced

back less and less I tend to walk around with notepads have five or six note-taking apps on my phones things like that but it's true so the stress now the good thing is if you work and forgive me cybersecurity the good thing is we really don't have to remember anything so stress that really is it's real there's any kind of stress chemical or physical so putting your body under stress we'll talk about that but so when people here's one just a chemo brain when people talk about chemo brain they're just starting to believe that's a real thing of course anybody that's ever been through chemotherapy will tell you of course it's a real thing so

anything that stresses your body whether it's work-related family related to weather has a negative impact on memory and I've got to talk about this one because I have no idea why they invited me to keynote like they're people that actually do [ __ ] that are here today why don't you have them up here I am an intermittently entertaining old guy I don't understand why anyone has any respect for me and I'm not kidding when I say that I guess I've done some stuff you know but everybody here's done stuff where I'm in a room full of brilliant people at here right thank you why I don't know a lot of us do this and

I think a little bit of humility is a great thing you know don't be too full of yourself we have enough of those in this industry but it can also be debilitating if you don't believe you deserve the opportunity you get you know the reality is a lot of times in this industry you don't deserve the opportunity you get but you get the opportunity and there are two different ways to look at it well ideally I would have earned this first but damn it I'm going to earn it now that's the correct one the other one is the flip those are those people who think they know what they're talking about but really don't these are actually opposite into the

spectrum the people who think they're brilliant it's interesting in a hacker community in particular most people who you know have impostor syndrome you know they should flip there are a lot of people that really need to doubt themselves that don't don't just leave it that so if we're talking about stress and we're not going to get into the burnout stuff a touch on it briefly but when you talk about a clinical stress clinical burnout there are three key words three measures Christina Maas walk to the seminal work on this there's one good word two bad words the good word is efficacy personal efficacy are you effective do you feel you're effective do you feel like you're doing a good job

that doesn't mean are we beating the bad guys every day but it's do you feel like you're contributing are you doing well the two bad words are exhaustion and this is you know that we got to decide good exhaustion right if you're you're one of those crazy people that cares about health and stuff and like runs and crap that good tired you get or you know you finished a prod and you feel good about it you're tired you feel good now this is the debilitating crushed exhaustion and then the third one is cynicism and in some studies we've done that is the core competency of information security and hacker world and I say that cynicism is

and it's interesting because this is lying you cross you can't be good at this I don't believe unless you're skeptical don't take stuff at face value crossing the line into cynicism starts to get dangerous in other fields in medical fields or in social work that instead of being cynicism is depersonalization when you no longer care about the people that you're responsible for in these things but ours the cynicism and boy are we good at it now one very important thing is this George Carlin quote which hurts me every time I put it up or somebody actually it gets thrown back at me more often than I share it these days inside every cynical person is a disappointed

idealist and that is also true in our community and so that disappointments a little rough so some years ago a bunch of us did a study on burnout we went through the numbers and what we saw it was since I'm in an actual institution I will you know give the disclaimer it was statistically insignificant but potentially informative it's kind of the way I feel about most of what I have to say too but so when I started looking at this how you avoid being in the other talk where people show us the scars from their suicide attempts and things the preventive let's look at the half that had no warning indicators was better random noise generation than what the

NSA convinced RSA to put in their product oh that's mean last time I made that joke I looked up and realized that the core sponsor of the event was parsing uh so moving on who wants some coffee you all have had lunch you want some coffee tell me if this starts to sound painfully familiar so we have a happy little coffee beans in the mountains right happy little coffee beans and some guy comes and tears them off of the plant and throws them in a bucket she hasn't been into a bucket cubicle whatever shifts them somewhere where they get roasted and then ground up and put in a machine where they add boiling hot water sometimes at extreme high

pressure cubicle what and then what gets spit out may be a wonderful magical elixir or it might be burnt and bitter and miserable and vindictive where maybe not vindictive I'm not sure of it vindictive coffee well yeah I take that back yeah so you know maybe you're not into straight espresso shots but maybe you know you want an Americano or a latte so you take you take this process and you do this magical bitter complex elixir and maybe you add sweetener maybe you had creamer maybe add water and you make it good that's what we're trying to do we're trying to do this stress burnout stack but keep things on the top above the filter so we have a nice clean

clean crisp coffee that's not burnt and not fried and so yeah we won't go through that that's too many words so I did the scientific thing several months ago and I got I mean seriously I got the like over 600 individual respondents over 700 responses not just on Twitter I got phone calls and texts and emails and things one of the better answers was this

so a couple of things that came out of that is I discovered there are large stresses and there are small stresses and some in between but what I what I saw was a split where a lot of people that have coping skills to put up with daily [ __ ] and a lot of people that can deal with big [ __ ] but sometimes they mix them up and so you have to understand the context you're working in if you have really good daily coping skills in a hopeless situation you are continuously trying to cope with something hopeless and you're miserable if you don't have those day-to-day coping skills then you may end up job

hopping because you can't solve little problems and you let it boil up until you can't stand it anymore so what I'm saying is context is important so some of you may know I am a native Texan born and raised in Texas and every few years they decide that they're going to secede and so here you know I get back to Texas with some regularity I was just in Dallas a couple of weeks ago and here we have your typical redneck pickup truck and it sends a very clear message right we understand what this redneck with cherry picker in the bed of his truck is telling us with his procession bumper sticker or do you because it turns out

if there's a Massachusetts plate on that pickup truck the message is and stay out

context matters actually what this means is I love to screw with my neighbors [Applause] but yeah whatever so what I'm saying is sometimes your situation is bad you need to take a big step this is not the place to take a big step so an ik data common answers from Twitter it must be right so how do you deal badly not well not well cry grant so but there are a lot of good answers so there's one huge category the number to answer i lump together as do something physical activity this is how most people cope when I used to do support I would get up walk 200 yards out of a building down the street go to

Starbucks could have ADD of caffeine walk back down and sit back down in my cubicle and resume support calls because being caffeinated all day is really good for stress but the thing is it kept me from reaching through the telephone you know kept me from implementing dope slap over IEP which I know some of you would like me to have invented another one that was you know so this is some extreme you know tough mudder move mud run whatever or get up and walk the Starbucks or walk around the building or you know camp or good whatever just do something physical a lot of folks do extreme stuff extremely lifting whatever you're doing some people go camping get

outside just do something physical music linear 7ds mush rock more like me [Music]

that's the sonics from 1965 by the way that's plunk many years before punk that's grunge decades before grunge sonic sir amazing but whatever the music is some people create music some people play in bands people often assume I have some you know ZZ Top or something I prefer the comparison to Darwin male pattern baldness overweight long beard but I get to master the mp3 player so I don't play music but I listen to a lot of music and it's whatever does it for you I wouldn't have discovered Luna leash reading on the gig I am shows a ton of stuff on YouTube amazing you know whatever it does it for you but music really can be good for you and you know

change it up and you know maybe the death metal stuff isn't ideal for calming you down but whatever does it for you you know it leads into the next topic [Music] [Laughter] [Music] so let's talk about alcohol the number one answer and look I drink too much I like to I'm an amateur bartender and professional drunk what's funny what's funny is I have made friends with a lot of really talented professional bartenders when I use that line they describe themselves the same way I don't drink near as much as I appear to on Twitter nobody drinks as much as I appear to on Twitter just for the record I would alright so on the upside I will

say most of us feel guilty for how much we drink but that is that was by far the number one coping skill that we've got that's that's an ideal you know at least I try to drink well if not less yeah it's later Jeff thank you which leads into this one so let's see so illegal drugs are a challenge so if they're prescribed some of them are deadly I'm not going to get into the whole thing but if people's prescribed drugs for you you need to take responsibility for your own health care and do some reality checks on things I'm not saying don't listen to therapists and clinicians if you need that help get it they're good

ones are good just be aware that there are side effects then we get into the legal recreational drugs so marijuana is legal recreationally in a lot of places and medically in law even more places in the US but it's still federally illegal and it makes trouble for people who are not US citizens coming back into the u.s. if you admit that you legally smoked marijuana in Denver when it was legal or Amster you know it's like oh that's illegal and you can't come back so people are having trouble so this is a challenge but you know marijuana is effects we don't have a lot of scientific epic evidence it's a lot of anecdotal evidence whatever you can look

at me and see my age yes I grew up in the 60s and 70s I am NOT going to be judgmental about your recreational use of pharmaceuticals to paraphrase and ambassador Duke just don't be dumb about it in this I've got a like cross the line into preaching us here a little bit so there's a lot of folks that are into biohacking if you're abusing drugs that have killed generations of people before you you're not biohacking you're abusing drugs and you're going to be the next generation of people that die doing stupid [ __ ] and I'm not going to say anything bad about a couple of people in our community that we have lost because

there were great people they did dumb [ __ ] but if Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin and generations before and after John Belushi couldn't do it you can't either don't be stupid have fun don't be stupid that's a little too preachy friends and family support especially mutual support is awesome but sometimes it's one-sided one of the interesting things that I've seen as people mature in this industry a lot of folks end up in this situation where they may have pretty good jobs they've moved careers have a pretty good job if kids in school kids going to college trying to figure out how to pay for that parents going into assisted living facilities so they're caring for

the generation before and after at the same time you can have a job as awesome as mine and be in that situation and realize you need to manage your own stress in your own relationships you know I am not in that situation but you know one of my peers are you know there's stuff outside you need to think about taking care of yourself because you can't take care of them and if it's mutual it's great but so here's one disconnect unplug this is one of the top five disconnect and unplug and this is really important if you are more trusting I would suggest that you close your eyes and tilt your head back and join me on a couple of little adventures

rain rides in Spanish I wanted Hills rolling by Jack's on the hill miles and miles while resident in bloom oh maybe just join me County for jaywalking

is indicated

now a couple of you are probably thinking dumbass aren't you saying to disconnect and unplug why were you recording that why were you holding your phone out the window of that train when you should have been having a good time with your wife you got me also there's this challenge of unplugging when you come back we've all done this right like I'm pretty good well the beauty is now we don't have to go through that we can put on our SmartWatch and it can haunt us everyday every minute here's the thing there's a latch on this it comes off the other thing that's really cool about this there's a Do Not Disturb button right on your wrist you

can like flip the timer to give me 30 minutes of peace and quiet set it to do not disturb so now we disconnect unplug there are actually companies that are doing this but a few hours at a time every bit you get disconnected some more answers these came in add various things mindfulness and meditation a lot of people found help in that professional therapy our world still has a problem saying we need to go to therapists for our social and mental situation we need to get over that various productivity tools if you're completely disorganized and it causes you trouble things like getting things done or whatever works for you do it right pets a lot of people find a lot of joy

in their pets hobbies video games is interesting my son works in support works from his house gets up in the morning turns on the computer hits the bathroom works for 30 minutes goes down makes a pot of tea comes back up works for a while lunchtime grabs lunch goes back upstairs sits in front of the computer that after work he goes downstairs makes dinner watches TV for 20 or 30 minutes while he eats dinner goes back up into his office and instead of facing this way at to his work computer he faces this way into the gaming console and spends the rest of the night there and it works for him but you're still sitting in front of computers you

know outdoors he goes outdoors once every week or two to get groceries and it works for him but you know I'm making fun of him but it works well for him but if if it's not working well if you don't do it I got some edge cases I think maybe some of these folks are screwing with me [Applause]

I I will say the covering yourself in peanut butter one came from an Australian friend of mine so that may actually be true okay and I'm about to be mean to you I'm sorry but I'm going to do it so sometimes life just figures a way to tell you it's time to readjust your perspective on life it's time to take a look at what's important and what's not a couple of you know what's coming sorry I want to be mean this is me in 1976 that's my girlfriend later wife we met when she was 14 and I was 15

this is on the porch of our winter retreat last year yes those are her cremated remains do not let life kick you this hard before you figure out what matters and what doesn't do not do it let's move beyond that one but let me tell you a few things my mother passed away when I was 31 breast cancer no big surprise 31 is a bit early to lose your parents but yeah it happens she'd been fighting cancer all of her life my own cancer bladder cancer hmm that's non-malignant you just have to have a really awkward exam on a regular basis for the rest of your life if any of you I know what that means so all I

did share something else over sharing because I want your attention yesterday was colonoscopy day for me the important thing about that is people tell me I'm full of crap I can bring you a doctor's note proving I'm not at least for today so um so I'm serious yeah Oh cancer oh well the tumors are non-malignant non metastasizing so what if I spent a couple of years back to back having bladder resections right before going to DEFCON and besides Vegas now whatever you know that's not that's I'm student is 50s with oh it's little cancer right it's minor cancer so yeah it was easy for me because I've had awesome jobs so the past decade but

anyway common sense don't face challenges alone in the school play yard do you get to go off now just Boy Scouts Girl Scouts let you know in the military do you go on no but we are all special defin snowflakes and we're going to do this job alone even for our team of 50 people and that's not healthy healthy and don't make employees face challenges alone I've got some counterintuitive advice for you do more because doing things that you want to do that are satisfying and rewarding volunteering mentoring speaking teaching teaching is awesome whether it's informal formal whatever because you have to learn what you're talking about because people are going to put you on the spot and

challenge it and makes you learn things sharing being engaged in community it's why I do what I do because I get a lot of value from what I give to the community mentorship is fantastic if you don't think you are a hypocrite you need to mentor somebody because you will tell them things like I've been in that situation and the one thing you can't do is this phone and then you pick up the bottle and drink because you've done it twice in your career and you're in the midst of doing it for the third time as you're telling people don't do that that's a terrible mistake that's career limiting and it's missed you'll be miserable and you know it because

you've done it learn something new education is work so it's got to be satisfying or give you an opportunity to get out of the hell holier in to be blonde I'm going to zip through some things but this is worth noting in the hacker community we've got this challenge you know oh he's the iPhone hacker no he's an actual human being who has done some amazing iphone work but when his career changes and he no longer hacks or she no longer hacks SCADA systems and he no longer hacks iPhones they remain actual people you are actual people you may be famous for something a lot of people think of means the 'besides guy but or the beardy guy

but there's there's actually somebody under all the layers of crap you're a person you know stuff you hack manage your employer these things apply if you want to talk about this as a manager employer we can we can do that offline but two questions you have too many qualified and trained employees and is it easy hiring the people you need too many words let's let's skip it so basically if you don't have any control over your environment you get stressed if you don't understand why things are happening you get stressed if you're at a company and you're a manager and you're going through an IPO and you have all of these bright young faces that are

relatively fresh out of school and they've never been through an IPO you need to sit him down and say we're going to do some really dumb [ __ ] because we want to make Wall Street happy not int not sentient human beings was a little blunt Jack so collectiveness my first real tangent collective nouns right so a bunch of cattle is a herd and a bunch of sheep is a flock my favorite one is a gathering of crows is a murder you know what you call the a feral gathering of Vice President an IPO some of you are going to laugh until you weep on that one provide feedback manage workloads let people disconnect maybe for sit VW actually

forces people to disconnect in Germany if they turn off access to email overnight for some employees offer education it's worth reciting the old joke of you know two executives talking about training budget but what if we train them and they leave what if we don't train them and they stay I travel a lot I get to have fun traveling because I have an awesome job some of your road warriors road warrior gets tiring even if you have an awesome job but you can make it suck less the trick is you've got to venture out the problem of venturing out is that you don't always know whether it's safe or not now sometimes you will find yourself in a

neighborhood where the crows are carrying knives and have ankle bracelets on it's like oh [ __ ] I think I think I will have that terrible burger at the Courtyard Cafe rather than venture out but if you do venture out you know my tip is in against life's not fair to women but single women wandering into bars alone is not always a great idea but you know one of my things is I make friends with bartenders everywhere I go because bartenders tend to be well-connected and underpaid and they will give you some great tips for where to get good food and drink at a reasonable price and how to avoid tourists or also what the most touristy

things are if you do nobody hydrates enough their whole books on how to travel well but drink more water everything you do is dehydrating when you fly my doctors swears by always taking antihistamines before you fly even if you're not snuffly that way you're not likely to get snuffly you're not going to have any Nate you know less likely to pick up something if you're here in the Northeast if you have dry heat a little sailing you don't have to netipot but a little sailing keep your nostrils nasal passages moisturized they won't dry out a crack when you get in the airplane you're less likely to pick up you funk from airplanes quickly helping others

you're not a professional but you can be a friend you can be appear you can be a mentor you can help people through do it for yourself do it for them do it for whatever reason when I was young I wanted everybody to do things for the right reason now you can be an egotistical bastard and if that's why you do good for the world I'm okay with it I'd still prefer you were a good person but that's alright whatever but back to that original slide if you're not in a good place you can't help others and don't try to and if you're in a bad place and this is getting off fob way off topic

even for me you know like some of you may have discovered this you get into relationships trying to fix people that's because you're broken too and neither of you is going to come out alright I don't have time and I'm getting close we're going to wrap it up but I'm going to go off on a tangent now so I'm going to yeah yeah back up there we go so I'm single for the first time in my life since I was fifteen right so I'm trying to reenter the dating game and it's really kind of rough and I try to use pickup lines that are like age-appropriate and honest and I'm having no luck it just doesn't work it's

like wow I bet you used to be hot thank that's didn't work didn't work at all is your name Samsonite you look like you've got a lot of baggage no no would you like to be my future Widow yeah I've had even less success with dear the daughter is that wrong all right I'm gonna waste more time so you know one of the things I've realized is talking to people who are dating in their 40s and 50s and 60s like everybody has a psychotic ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend and I don't write because I was in a wonderful relationship for 40-plus years which means I have a psychotic future girlfriend I'm sitting in the bar it's like you could be the one again back to

the wisdom of Bob Dylan sometimes just listening to people is all it takes we need to de-stress the hardcore burnout stuff a lot of people just needed to vent and you know you steer them so I'm going to close with story about knowing what's important to you so one of the things it's obvious is if you're a guitarist your guitar is important to you [Music] in the winter of 1949 BB King is a Gibson Lucille variant you can buy from Gibson he was playing King was playing in a dance hall in twist Arkansas old you know plywood wood Shack thrown together the heating system that they used was 55-gallon metal drum with top cutoff half filled with kerosene like

the kerosene fire comes up everybody dances around at the bands on one side two guys start fighting they knock it over so we have a bear wood building with a bear wood floor which now has 25 or 30 gallons of burning kerosene that's poured across the wood technical term for this is bad the entire Hall goes up in flames they evacuate BB King gets out with the band of the car realizes he left his brand-new 35 dollar guitar inside the hall so he ran back in and got it got it out they got in the car and drove away getting ready for the next night show they heard what had happened who was two guys fighting over a woman and

the woman's name was Lucille and a couple of people others had died in the fire others were injured and he named that guitar Lucille to remind himself to never do anything that's stupid again and the rest of his life so when you go to Hard Rock Cafe is and other things you will find guitars that look a lot like this that have his signature on him and every one of them is a real Lucille but he didn't need a guitar I mean he's a guitar he didn't need that one guitar when I granted being one of the best guitar players in human history he can pick up pretty much anything and do it but he committed himself I need a guitar

I want this style I want NES 355 for the guitar nerds 355 is the stereo version of the 335 he's one of the few big commercial artists that had commercial success of a stereo guitar but that's why some of his stuff when you listen to it is the way it is he's playing a stereo electric guitar but anyway you know BB King you know you see some people like Dick Dale to play the same axe for 50 years Owen makes sense because that's a hand-built thing leo fender built dick dale's guitar for him but BB King didn't need a specific guitar he knew it was important not being dead in a fire was important again hopefully it doesn't take any of

the abuses that I've just given you so sources know these are sources of stress let's talk about a few sources if you're interested in this ping me I'll share some stuff with you American Psychological Association it's sort of pop psychology but every year they do a study on stress in America new topic or theme every year some good information in there Christina Maas Locke did this I'm going to work on this with Michael Leiter Robert Sapolsky has done a lot of interesting stuff some of his stuff gets a little crunchy granola for me but that's all right and then a handful of podcasts recent southern-fried security and rally security podcasts have touched on on stress and burnout and that is not

the end that's the end of my talk I think we're pretty much out of time but if you want to catch me I'll be around this evenings afternoon I'm easy to find on that internet thing but there's a lot more good content and after the day is over you continue with the conversations and connections that you've made here today and have a great time and enjoy the rest of b-sides

Oh Oh unofficial endorsement there's this book I don't agree with it the whole point of the subtle art of not giving a is he teaches you do not give any and then choose very wisely where you spin to them so they it's a spoiler alert it's not about not giving any it's about giving them only when they matter so it we also have a little gift for Jack Oh bartender he said so we actually got Gentleman Jack with the Boston besides look awesome thank you very much thank you [Applause]